NASCAR Driver, Kurt Busch Believes His Ex Is La Femme Nikita

Updated: January 13, 2015
kurt and patricia

Perhaps all the time spent in super-charged race-cars going 200 MPH has finally melted the brain of the NASCAR driver known as the ‘Outlaw.’ Kurt Busch testified today that he believes his ex-girlfriend, Patricia Driscoll is indeed a trained assassin, dispatched on clandestine missions across the globe.

Is this the best defense Busch can concoct to fend off domestic abuse charges? “Everybody on the outside can tell me I’m crazy,” Busch said. “But I lived on the inside and saw it firsthand.”  Busch went on to claim he found Driscoll bloodied in post-assassin form as if she’d simply come home after slicing some poor shmuck up.

Apparently, Busch and his defense team are doing their best to dis-credit his ex-girlfriend in effort to establish that she is out to ruin his career and one might guess to at some point murder him, as well.

This story is about as weird as it gets. According to Busch, Driscoll told him about several of her “missions” which took her to South America and as far as Africa.  One allegation Busch made was a time the two were in El Paso when Driscoll left in camo and returned later wearing a trench coat over an evening gown – soaked in blood.

There are a multitude of other assertions from Busch that seem completely impossible, including Driscoll being a US Government trained and employed assassin who “takes out foreign governments.”  But why is this so unbelievable?  I’ll tell you why. Clandestine operators for the CIA or otherwise live lives of anonymity.  They stay out of the public eye and they certainly don’t date race car drivers.

Kurt is one of our heroes here at BUSCHLeagueSports and it’s sad to see a once great driver slide into a state of paranoid schizophrenia.  If he’s in touch with reality and this shit is all true, it could be one of the greater sports related stories of all time.  I wonder if the alleged Ninja, Driscoll, is great in the sack?